1. Certain Leaders In Government Look Or Act Like Certain Pop Culture References! (4:51)
2. Women, Please Rinse Off Your Vagina And Anus! (5:10)
3. I've Taken A Popular Contemporary Pop Song And Changed The Lyrics To Comment On The Proliferation Of Starbucks In My Neighborhood! (3:16)
4. A Rapid Series Of Comical Noises! (3:57)
5. Although Indigent, Rural Families Have Little To Say In The Matter, Third Rate Public Education Has Kept Them Ignorant And Thus, Great Sources Of Ridicule! (2:48)
6. My Child Is Enthralling, Especially When It Says Something Unexpectedly Precocious Even Though It Doesn't Understand What It Just Said! (8:38)
7. My Immigrant Mom Talks Funny! (13:37)
8. When It Comes To Jews, Behavior One Might Perceive As Obnoxious And Annoying I Present As "Quirky" But It's Okay To Joke About It Because I, Myself, Am Jewish! (6:01)
9. Pandering To The Locals! (7:13)
10. Even Though I Am In The Closet, That Won't Prevent Me From Getting Cheap Laughs At The Expense Of Homosexuals! (2:37)
11. Weathermen Have Become, For The Most Part, Obsolete! (2:53)
12.1. When All Is Said And Done, I Am Lonely And Miserable And Barely Able To Mask My Contempt For The Audience As I Trot Out The Same Sorry Act I've Been Doing Since The Mid-Eighties! (5:15)
12.2. (silence) (3:19)
12.3. Untitled (4:17)

Audio Preview may contain additional or different songs not on the vinyl or CD release.